[Editor’s Note: Have you ever dealt with circumstances in life which you do not understand? Maybe it is infertility, the loss of a loved one or maybe doors that never seem to open? Have you prayed to God but the answers you received were not the answers you wanted? If so, join me today as we read Hope’s story as she journeyed through the valleys of sorrow in life to finally reach the mountaintop which God ordained for her. A journey which led her to be thankful for every little thing, good or bad, to ultimately realize that God alone, His grace is enough, even when it comes in unexpected packages.]

Over the past four years, I have experienced deep sorrow, immense joy and everything in between. I sit here today thankful for all of it, every single thing. It feels weird to say that I am thankful that my baby was handed a fatal diagnosis at nearly 12 weeks gestation, forcing us to make the most difficult decision of our lives and terminate the pregnancy. It feels weird to say that I am thankful for the miscarriage I suffered with my second pregnancy. It feels weird to say that I am thankful for the anxiety I experienced during my third pregnancy. It feels weird to say that I am thankful for my struggles with infertility. It just feels weird to be thankful for all of the bad things that have happened in my life. But I AM thankful.

I am thankful because these experiences have changed me from the inside-out and made me a better person. I am thankful because if I had not had these experiences, I would not be the person I am today. I am thankful because these experiences brought me closer to God and gave me the ability to handle whatever is to come with grace, dignity and strength.

I made the decision early on to cling to God during the hardest times – to run to Him instead of away from Him. For the first time in my life I had to learn to trust that God has a plan and that His plan is perfect (Jeremiah 29:11). I had always believed this on the surface, but on May 7, 2012, I had to start really living it.

It is through these struggles that I also learned that God’s answers to our prayers are not always the answers we expect. When we received the diagnosis, I prayed for God to take the decision to terminate out of our hands. I prayed that during the next ultrasound there would not be a heartbeat. But there was a heartbeat and we had to make a heartbreaking choice. When I woke up spotting four days after finding out I was pregnant again, I prayed I was not losing the baby. But my levels were dropping and I was experiencing a miscarriage. Every month through my struggle with infertility I prayed for a positive pregnancy test and month after month, God’s answer was for me to wait.

Just like Paul in 2 Corinthians 12, I pleaded for God to take away the pain, to make everything better. But He didn’t and I continued to face hardships. Looking back I can see that He was enough. His grace was enough. I can see that all of these hardships were used to strengthen me. My faith was strengthened. Relationships were strengthened. My self-worth was strengthened. Throughout all of those “differently than I expected” answered prayers, God showed up. He never left my side. Just like Paul, I was weak, but I was made strong.

God has taken these struggles and allowed His power to be displayed. When we were at the end of our “fertility rope” I conceived our son naturally with no medical intervention. And three months after he was born I conceived the unexpected blessing of our daughter. Unlike my pregnancy with my son, I was able to experience an anxiety-free pregnancy with my daughter.

Through these struggles I started writing and sharing my story publicly. God is using it to give hope to others in similar situations. He has birthed a book concept to help women who are pregnant after loss fight fear with faith and a ministry to help women lead better lives by trusting in His perfect plan. It is all beyond my wildest dreams. Without all of my struggles, none of this would be possible. So that is how I can be thankful for everything I have been through. That is why I wouldn’t change anything about my story, even the struggles.

If you are faced with a struggle, hold onto these scriptures that may give you hope:

Romans 15:13: “May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.” (NIV)

Isaiah 43:1-2: “…Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze.” (NIV)

Bio: Hope H. Dover is a wife, mother, writer, teacher and, most importantly, a child of God. Hope experienced two pregnancy losses and struggled with infertility before delivering two healthy babies eleven months apart. Over the years she has also worked hard to overcome anxiety and depression. Determined to find purpose in her pain, Hope has made it her mission to help women build better lives while trusting in God’s perfect plan.

You can also find Hope at:

www.hopehdover.com; www.facebook.com/hopehdover; www.instagram.com/hopehdover; www.pinterest.com/hopehdover; www.twitter.com/hopehdover