If I were to ask you today, “Who do you draw your love, happiness, guidance or your self-worth from?” What would your answer be?
Do you only feel loved when someone makes you feel that way? Do you look for happiness in relationships and is it depending on how people treat you? Is your self-worth dependent on how someone else makes you feel or can you separate your worth from another’s opinion of you?
The truth is, no person can give you what you are looking for. When it comes to true love, joy, guidance or self-worth, our only reliable source is God. No person can impart the love of God in you, only God can fill that hole for you. No person can give you a joy that cannot disappoint. Who you really are and what you are capable of cannot be determined by a person, because it is established in you through the calling God breathed into your life—He made you who you are in Christ. The only way you can miss out on that reality for your life is when you look to people to define and provide for you, instead of God. When you give other people the power to define you, you will lose who you really are.
No human being was made to replace God’s place in our lives. God may use people to let us experience love and joy or to assist in guiding us, but they are not the source thereof, God is. People make mistakes, whether they want to or not. We are all fallible while we are in our fleshly bodies on this earth.
We get hurt just like we have the ability to hurt others. Therefore, we should not be devastated when we put our trust in a person and get disappointed, because as humans that is what we do—whether intentional or not. The good we have in us is not because of our own efforts, but because of Christ in us. If we want to be satisfied, we need to look to Jesus and draw from Him whatever we feel we are lacking. When He provides, we are satisfied beyond our needs.
We should not pressure our loved ones or friends to meet our deepest desires of feeling loved, worthy and treasured. They do not always have the means or know-how to do it, but if we look to God for it, He will equip them to fulfil our hearts’ desires.
When we take the pressure off our loved ones to be our “perfect providers”, we get to enjoy ourselves and allow one another to make mistakes, because we know we are all capable thereof. The only reason why we get to do things right at times is by God’s grace that helps us. As we turn towards God for our provision in all aspects, we are giving every relationship the best chance it has of being great.
The most important aspect is that when we turn to God and accept who we are in Him, no disappointment in this world can affect our self-worth, because we know that we are established in Christ. The One who is forever the same—yesterday, today and tomorrow (Hebrews 13:8). Our position and value in Christ is fixed and the more we make it a reality in our lives, the less power do we give people to hurt and disappoint us.
If you have reached a point where you are no longer sure of who you are, do not be discouraged. If people’s opinions have played too big a role in the picture you have of yourself, choose to change it. No person can have power over who you are, unless you give them such power. People’s opinions about you change consistently, but God’s opinion of you never does.
The worth God imparted in you in your mother’s womb is still there. As you turn your focus away from other people or yourself and towards God, He will rekindle the fire of His purpose for your life. You are His beloved child and you are walking in His righteousness. When He looks at you, He sees greatness, favor and great potential. Come and draw from Him whatever you need. You do not have to earn it, it is already yours, you must only take it and make it your own!